Sylvia's World...

Not in a good mood now.. everything is coming apart.. sumhow sometime i feel that i am a lucky person.. sometime i feel that i am a unlucky person lame rite who dun think this way.. just celebrated bday for one of my friend.. perhaps i am a sensitive person.. sumhow one way or another i feel that we are drifting apart... dunno why dun wish to find out why.. just wish to leave it this way as it is.. said hi to her today on msn.. but she just told me that she is hafing a bad mood and dun wish to tok.. i just kep quiet.. coz i dun wish to say anyting.. she had already indicated the pt that she dun wish to tok to me.. so there is no pt in saying anyting anymore.. coz it will just make me feel like a clown.. in a friendship.. what is right and what is wrong.. i dunno and dun wish to find out anymore.. in any case i haf already settled on the fact that bee ting will be my only closest secondary friend.. the rest.. those that used to be close wif me.. ultimately will be the ones who hurted me the most.. hmm mayb you cannot blame them.. coz it might be my problem.. given that all my sec school close friend are doin this.. but i am really tired.. i always asked myself.. did i stand by them when they are upset or when i know that they are down.. the ans is yes.. a firm yes.. i will stand by them when i noe that they are upset.. but i am feelin tired now.. the more i tried to stand by them, the more i feel that i am being treated like dirt and a clown.. I shall not mention who is that friend.. but if that friend so happened to be looking at this blog.. i am not trying to be mean by bloggin this down.. you noe me.. i never like to go to sore part like why are we drifting apart or why are we no longer as close to each other as before.. but i just wish to let you know that we are drifting apart.. i understand that this is part and parcel of time.. you get to know new ppl at diff stage of life and you drift apart from old ones.. but i am just upset wif the way conversation are goin nowadays.. seems like you are always angry when you tok to me.. and it seems like you are channeling your anger towards me.. for no reason.. Seriously i am tired.. i am not goin to do anyting anymore or say anyting anymore.. becoz the more i say it will just makes me hate myself even more for being a clown..

Well.. i noe that i seldom say this.. but then i haf to say it.. Thanks HMW and HBL.. i noe that the both of you purposely came back to accompany me for dinner... i noe it okie.. coz i am ATC mah.. so i am supposed to see thru tings and analyse tings at a faster speed..
I noe that the both of you noe that i am upset..that is why you all make the effort to accompany me for dinner.. though one haf to bring two kids in toll and another one had to waste his petrol to fetch me home.. see it is all this little little tings that keep me going.. coz i noe that ren jian you wen qing.
Anyway i had a wonderful dinner.. it is been a loong time since the three of us had dinner and i really dun remember when was the last time.. thought it is just instant noodle.. and it tasted weird.. and i had to go to ntuc wif you all to buy ingredient in my pandan cake uniform.. but it was nice... and let me repeat another time.. i am not stupid till i dunno hw to cook noodle.. just that i like my noodle nice, soft and bloated like udon mee.. wahahahah...
Overall i had a nice evening.. and it sort of lighten up the gloomy weather in my heart..

Yes.. i created a blogspot for my younger nephew, Rey... before you all start to say that i am biased and only do a website for Rey and nothing for Rex (my elder nephew), he haf a friendster and neopets a/c hor... so in order to be fair also haf to created sumting for Rey rite.. so i created a blogspot for him... and i haf to use excellent customer service also hor.. coz the mummy is super duper picky.. firstly i use a bugs bunny background for the website then she say that it is not good coz they dun like bugs bunny.. so i change it to a cartoon angel and cartoon devil background.. then she say that it is nt good again because anyting is better than tis.. (picky rite.. first bugs bunny cannot.. then cartoon angel and cartoon devil she say anyting is better)... so i finally found the background that fit them to a T... i found a Incredible background... wif music summore... if she still say that it is not nice.. i will *slap* *slap* her.. Anyway if you all want to view my master creation.. just go to link and click on Rex and Rey..
Kie kie a little update about myself... recently had been pretty fulfilling.. work.. play.. enjoy myself and created a little blog for my nephew.. life have once again started moving for me.. i am no longer stagnant at one stage of my life.. but then i heard some news about him again.. this news sort of created a wave of emotion in my heart.. i noe that i dun really like him anymore.. like what i had blogged previously.. but now i noe of this.. it is sad that i didnt get this update.. but this just tell me that we are just friend.. or worse just x-colleague.. i will be fine again in a few days.. before you all go oh no.. the depression period is cuming again.. nope it is not.. just a v. bland feelin in my heart that is a little bit sour.. that is all.. the depression period wun come back.. because i noe that he does not know anyting about my feeling and it is not worth it to dwell on somebody who will never be able to know about your feeling and whom you noe that you will never be together with him and whats more a future wif him... No worries i will be fine in a few days time...
Kie kie that is all for now.. when i haf anyting mor i will blog again...

Hmm.. let see havent been bloggin for like three weeks.. wow tat seems like so long i last blog since when i hafin my two week hols.. then after that i started working, alot of tings happened but all seems to be happening at a v. fast speed.. now i am already third week into my job.. and trust me.. time flies...

Hmm did not really did alot of reflection this few days.. coz i am super duper tired... but anyway.. life is pretty much still the same for me.. no chances, still gettin bullied by my nephew, quarral with my mum as and when i like... still luffin at my sister for being a bimbo.. haha.. bullying beeting as and when i like.. life is pretty much the same.. nothing change.. one ting for sure i am happier now.. after i left my previous job.. i seem to have put down a v. big burden.. Anyway mittin karen and linda for dinner tonite.. so haf to go.. till then stay happy.. =D